smile..

in between days..

 

funny..

i see the world trough my eyes with a bitter sweet song of its imperfection.

and im proud of it. im proud of what i am and im proud of what im not.

when you try too keep looking and try to find what its mean, you will never understand it.

yes...redefine yourself and the light will shine.

 

anything is everything.

what you want and what you dont want.

 

funny...

i never know what i want.

but i know what i dont want.

 

it is pain an yes it is pain.

i try and i try and yes it is pain.

i smile and i smile and yes it still painfull.

itry to run , run as far as i could, run as fast as i can, run as long as i can....it still painfull.

yes it is pain.

it is pain.

 

i try to lie..i try everything..

and yes it is pain.

 

funny...my name is pain.

hello..whats yours?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What you don't recognise is that they are realising that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.
You look at your job, and it is not even close to what you
thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and
realising that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that
scares you.Your opinions have gotten stronger.

 

 You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realise that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You
laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and
scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and
cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realise that the past is
drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do
but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could
do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet
anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you
love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you
are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One
night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted
and acting like an idiot don't seem as fun.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over,
and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot
seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and
making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would
be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realise is that everyone reading this relates
to it.We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as
hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

 

yes, it is an interesting read..

some wise person once told me..

there's no such thing as a happy ending in life..

because life...is a series of moments..

that keep changing everytime..

and you are ...a part of it.

sometimes from a beautiful mind comes out an idea of a nightmare.

yes, its is my brain and my weak heart that control me to image something beautiful.

from the paint of my life i describe and redefine what future is.

my life divided by chapter and pages that continously come and go.

and every chapter..

 

is a horor and worst novel ever made.

 

a novel

by me.

 

and myself.